Posts Tagged ‘loser’

50 Ways to Leave the White House

December 4, 2020

“Fifty Ways to Leave the White House,” written by Paul Simon, with new lyrics by Don Caron, about a lame duck dilemma that Jimmy Kimmel calls “Squattergate.” Produced by the Parody Project.


Comments are welcome if they are on-topic, substantive, concise, and not boring or obscene. Comments may be edited for clarity and length.

The 2020 Election is Over

November 25, 2020

The 2020 Election is Over
Despite the wild ramblings of Rudy Giuliani and the Fox Cinematic Universe and the bitter tweets of our Golf Cheat in Chief (who will never concede), Joseph Biden is the winner of the 2020 election and Donald J. Trump is the loser. Joe Biden won 306 electoral votes, and won the popular vote by a margin of 6 million. The GSA knows it, GOP senators and governors know it, Fox personalities know it, the Secret Service knows it, state officials certifying election results know it, and the Electoral College will ceremonially confirm it on December 14th.

What isn’t over is Trumpism. A hefty fraction of the millions of Trump voters — the angry, alienated MAGA voters uninterested in facts even if that kills them — will continue to read Trump’s tweets and listen to his phone calls to the rightwing media bubble. Trumpism isn’t politics, it’s a lifestyle choice. Donald Trump doesn’t actually need to run for office in 2024 to take advantage of that MAGA World affection. He can just tease another run to stay in the public eye and leverage that attention to his economic advantage, the way he used 1980s gossip columns to raise his profile, the better to fool people into backing his terrible business deals.

Bottom line: Those red hats won’t be going away any time soon.


“‘Loser’: How a Lifelong Fear Bookended Trump’s Presidency,” Dan Barry, New York Times

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Top image by Mike Licht. Download a copy here. Creative Commons license; credit Mike Licht,

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Trump’s Legal Team Blusters and Blunders On

November 23, 2020

Trump's Legal Team Blusters and Blunders On

From his executive command center at Virginia’s Trump National Golf Club, the lame-duck president continues to fight for a job he’s had no interest in performing, deploying a team of cracked crack-smoking crack lawyers under a hair-dye-sweating Rudy Giuliani to courts across the nation in an attempt to invalidate the will of the people. Recent highlights:

Attempting to earn his $20K-a-day rate, Mr. Giuliani appeared in a federal courtroom for the first time in 30 years. The Republican judge reproved him for ignorance of basic legal terms, likened his claims to “Frankenstein’s Monster … haphazardly stitched together,” and laughed them out of court, writing “This is simply not how the Constitution works.”

In Wisconsin, Trump campaign lawyer Jim Troupis wants the court to invalidate his own vote. He wants to throw out all the early voting ballots, and that’s how he and his wife voted. We don’t don’t know what Mr. Troupis is being paid for this, but the campaign paid $3 million for the two-county recount effort.

On Saturday, Trump lawyer Sidney Powell claimed the presidential election was rigged by Venezuela’s Hugo Chávez, who died in 2013, claimed a voting machine company bribed Georgia’s Republican officials to throw the electon to Biden, and proposed a “Biblical lawsuit” on behalf of Donald Trump in the Peach State. Even Chris “Bridgegate” Christie was embarrassed. Ms. Powell was booted from the Trump legal team — not for being nuts, but for undermining Georgia GOP officials before the state’s crucial senate runoff elections.

And, ultimately, it may be Republican anxiety over those Georgia senate runoffs, which threaten the GOP stranglehold on congress, that will force Mr. Trump to accept his defeat. Big party donors are telling the Republican leadship they won’t contribute a dime to the Georgia campaigns if the president doesn’t concede, and spend even more time on his golf courses.


“Trump’s Pennsylvania Appeal Rejected in Scathing Decision by His Own Appointee,” Tracy Connor, Daily Beast

“Pennsylvania Supreme Court dismisses lawsuit against mail ballots with prejudice in another defeat for Trump,” Elise Viebeck, Washington Post


“Donor sues pro-Trump group over failure to prove voter fraud: ‘Empty promises,'” Jordan Williams, The Hill

“Joe Biden gains votes in Wisconsin county after Trump-ordered recount,” The Guardian

“20 days of fantasy and failure: Inside Trump’s quest to overturn the election,” Philip Rucker, Ashley Parker, Josh Dawsey and Amy Gardner, Washington Post

More Updates:

“How Is Trump’s Lawyer Jenna Ellis ‘Elite Strike Force’ Material?” Jeremy W. Peters and Alan Feuer, New York Times

“Pro-Trump legal crusade peppered with bizarre blunders,” Zach Montellaro and Kyle Cheney, Politico

“Delusional Trump Says He’ll Waste 125 Of His Energy Into Already Low Energy Election Lawsuits,” Summer Concepcion, Talking Points Memo

“Judges turn back claims by Trump and his allies in six states as the president’s legal effort founders,” Elise Viebeck, Emma Brown and Rosalind S. Helderman, Washington Post

“Trump thought courts were key to winning. Judges disagreed.” Colleen Long and Ed White, Associated Press

“Supreme Court Rejects Texas Suit Seeking to Subvert Election,” Adam Liptak, New York Times

“Wisconsin Supreme Court Justices Tell Trump Lawyer His Election Suit ‘Smacks of Racism,’” Adam Klasfeld, Law & Crime

“‘The last wall’: How dozens of judges across the political spectrum rejected Trump’s efforts to overturn the election,” Rosalind S. Helderman and Elise Viebeck, Washington Post

“Trump’s Legal Arguments Are Getting More Delusional. Support From Republicans Just Keeps Growing,” Paul McLeod, BuzzFeed News

“Trump Orders Space Force to Discover Other Planets with Courts,” Andy Borowitz, The New Yorker

Even More Updates:

“Trump Lost 59 Election Cases Before Electoral College Vote (and Counting),” Zoe Tillman, BuzzFeed News

“Kilmeade Asks Stephen Miller If Trump’s Failing Lawsuits Mean He Has ‘Worst Legal Team,’” Summer Concepcion, TalkingPointsMemo

“Judge Briskly Tosses Out GOP Georgia Ballot Challenge Hours After It Was Lodged,” Kate Riga, TalkingPointsMemo

“Conspiracy-theorist lawyer Sidney Powell spotted again at White House,” Martin Pengelly, The Guardian

“Trump wants Supreme Court to overturn Pa. election results,” Jill Colvin and Marc Levy, Associated Press

Wait! Wait! Additional Updates:

“Sidney Powell’s Hidden ‘Kraken’ Witness Is a Pro-Trump Podcaster Once Sued for Fraud,” Blake Montgomery, Daily Beast

“Federal court rejects Trump’s Wisconsin election challenge,” Daniel Uria, UPI

“Dominion Voting Systems Employee Sues Trump Campaign And Allies, Alleging Defamation,” Bente Birkeland, Colorado Public Radio

Even More Horrible Updates:

“Rep. Gohmert Calls for Street Violence as Another Legal Loss Sends MAGA World Spiraling,” Justin Rohrlich, Daily Beast

“Louie Gohmert Suggests People ‘Go to the Streets’ and Be ‘Violent’ After Judge Throws Out Baseless Election Suit,” Peter Wade, Rolling Stone

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Top image by Mike Licht. Download a copy here. Creative Commons license; credit Mike Licht,

Comments are welcome if they are on-topic, substantive, concise, and not obscene. Comments may be edited for clarity and length.

‘I’ll Sue!’ Says Most Litigious President Ever

November 10, 2020

'I'll Sue!' Says Most Litigious President Ever

After losing to Joe Biden in the election, Donald Trump is continuing his economic stimulus policy of full employment for lawyers, suing in several states to try overturning his rejection by a majority of voters, claiming his victory has been “stolen” because states are actually counting actual votes. He first asked several states to stop counting votes while he seemed to be ahead, before all the Biden-leaning mail-in ballots were counted. Mr. Trump, former owner of the failed U.S.F.L. New Jersey Generals football team, essentially asked the refs to stop the game in the 3rd quarter and declare him the winner.

Donald Trump had already used campaign funds to pay lawyers in pre-election lawsuits, and continues to make his supporters pay for his sore-loser legal claims, but state taxpayers will foot the bill for defending election boards against the spurious suits. It’s not surprising that Mr. Trump would resort to the courts for his hail-mary legal claims. In 2016, while he was the GOP candidate, Donald Trump was involved in 3500 lawsuits. His legal team should be grateful to be paid with campaign funds. As a businessman, Donald Trump had a habit of stiffing his lawyers.

UPDATE: Donald Trump has found a way to further his baseless legal claims for free — he’s going to pay for them with your tax dollars. Attorney General William Barr has authorized the U.S. Department of Justice to pursue these wacky conspiracy theories in violation of common sense. This also violates long-standing DOJ policy, so the director of the Election Crimes Branch, the official in charge of election fraud investigations, has resigned.