Posts Tagged ‘grandiose’

Gingrich Battles in Gulf Coast and Lunar Primaries

March 13, 2012

Gingrich Battles in Gulf Coast and Lunar Primaries

Disgraced former Speaker Newt Gingrich is vying for Intergalactic Republican Supremacy in Tuesday’s primary battle for Truth, Justice, Adultery and the American Way. “America has a destiny in space,” Mr. Gingrich bravely told a crowd of aerospace engineers at the U.S. Space and Rocket Center in Huntsville. No odds on what he dealt out to casino workers in Biloxi.

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Newt’s Next Job

February 27, 2012

Newt's Next Job

Let’s face it, disgraced ex-Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich isn’t going to be the Republican presidential candidate, let alone the next U.S. President. Frankly, after the kind of things he’s been saying, no one on Earth would give him a job.

Of course, Mr. Gingrich would rather slip the bonds of Earth for a job in outer space, as despot ruler of his Moon Base. But lunar colonies are too expensive and illegal and, in any case, the man doesn’t have any kind of executive experience.  There may be a related opportunity, however, and Newt Gingrich has the perfect résumé and wardrobe. He would make a great maître d’ at the Orbital Playboy Club on the Virgin Galactic Space Station.

Related:

“Is moon base really the ‘weirdest’ Newt Gingrich idea? Maybe not.” Peter Grier, Christian Science Monitor

“Newt Gingrich’s Fantasy Campaign—and the Fictions That Gave Rise to It,” Jeet Heer, The Atlantic

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Newt Skywalker, Space Cadet!

January 27, 2012

Newt Skywalker, Space Cadet

Newt Gingrich, disgraced ex-Speaker of the House, addressed GOP voters on Florida’s Space Coast this week, so of course he spoke of reviving the area’s aerospace industry by colonizing the Moon. Perhaps he’ll campaign in Nevada in support of gambling and whorehouses.

But Mr. Gingrich has soared through the deep void of space since 1984, when he, along with David Drake and 2nd ex-wife Marianne, published Window of Opportunity: A Blueprint for the Future. Today, copies of that volume sell for as much as 66 cents.

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