Anthony Weiner Gets Top Job

Disgraced sleazoid and former congressman Anthony Weiner (aka Carlos Danger) has a new top job. That’s right, he’s working for a Brooklyn kitchen countertop company. Wait, you’re gonna eat off of that? Like Mr. Weiner, the countertop materials are recycled.

In case you forgot, Donald Trump, a great judge of character, donated to Anthony Wiener’s 1997 city council campaign and 2007 and 2010 congressional campaigns.

More:

“Anthony Weiner piecing together shattered life as CEO of broken glass factory,” Reuven Fenton and Bruce Golding, NY Post

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Lock Up Your Daughter’s iPad! Carlos Danger Is On the Loose.

Disgraced former congressman Anthony Weiner (aka Carlos Danger) will exit prison early, leaving his fellow sex offenders behind (what an awkward last phrase).

More:

“Anthony Weiner to be released early from federal prison,” Matthew Choi, Politico

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Carlos Danger’s In the Dungeon

Disgraced former congressman Anthony Weiner (aka Carlos Danger) finally entered prison on Monday after pleading guilty to sending sexty photos to a 15-year-old girl.. Since quitting Congress and losing a local election in New York City, Mr. Weiner was fired by Time-Warner cable news outlet NY1 and the New York Daily News, and divorced by Huma Abedin. Mr. Danger Weiner will spend 21 months in a federal lockup near Boston, where other celebs include inside-trader Raj Rajaratnam, and Bernie Madoff’s kid brother Peter. 40 percent of the slammer’s residents are sex offenders.

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2016 Election Becomes a Weiner Roast

The fate of the nation now depends on the undoubtedly unsanitary laptop of disgraced former congressman Anthony Weiner (aka Carlos Danger). His estranged wife, foreign relations pro and Hillary Clinton advisor Huma Abedin, may have exchanged email with Secretary Clinton on that device. FBI Director James Comey decided to end his law enforcement career in absolute disgrace by revealing this vague detail of an ongoing investigation 11 days before the the 2016 presidential election.

The FBI doesn’t know if any emails on the computer are classified, or are duplicates of emails they’ve already cleared, but someone does: Donald Trump. The GOP candidate knows more about ISIS than the generals, so he knows more about what’s on that computer than the FBI does. In fact, Mr. Trump is so prescient and such a great judge of character that he donated to Anthony Wiener’s 1997 city council campaign and 2007 and 2010 congressional campaigns.

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Carlos Danger Rides Again — Into Bachelorhood

Disgraced former congressman Anthony Weiner (aka Carlos Danger) was caught with his pants down again, outed by the New York Post for sending sexty photos to strange women. His wife, foreign relations pro and Hillary campaign advisor Huma Abedin, invoked the 3-strikes-you’re-out rule and announced the couple’s separation.

Since quitting Congress and losing a local election in New York City, Anthony Weiner has been a commentator for Time-Warner cable news outlet NY 1 and a columnist for the New York Daily News. The TV outfit has put him on “indefinite leave,” and the Daily News cut him loose.

Serial adulterer and Anthony Weiner campaign contributor Donald Trump expressed sympathy for Ms. Abedin and smeared her boss Hillary Clinton in a single tweet. Anthony Weiner should remind his pal Mr. Trump how dangerous Twitter can be.

More:

“Hillary Clinton aide Huma Abedin says she’s separating with Anthony Weiner amid third sexting scandal,” Jeff Stein, Vox

“Trump sees personal tragedy and embarrassment as just political fodder,” Ruth Marcus, Washington Post

“Don’t Expect Donald Trump to Stop Lying About Huma Abedin,” Robert Mackey, The Intercept

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Mr. Weiner Hangs It Up

Rep. Anthony D. Weiner (D-NY 9) resigned from Congress. He didn’t tweet about it, but the media noticed.

All Weiner All The Time

Congressman Anthony D. Weiner’s odd hobby is God’s gift to media. Now he’s asking to take a leave of absence to get therapy. Fellow Democrats are asking him to take a hike.