Miss Congeniality Rocks GOP Convention

Sarah Louise Heath Palin, Governor of all 670 000 Alaskans, energized the Republican Base at the Republican Convention last night, causing a brief shortage of blood pressure medication in the St. Paul area. As Vice President, Governor Palin said, she will employ the same administrative skills she used as Mayor of Wasilla, AK (population then: 5500). That means she and John McCain will hire a City Administrator to do their jobs so they can spend their time trying to ban books in public libraries and and keep Sex Ed out of classrooms.

In her prepared remarks, Governor Palin chastised “Community Organizers” and their failed, unAmerican methods of “Self-Help” and “Citizen-Involvement.” Thanks to the efforts of Mayor Palin (and suburban sprawl from nearby Anchorage), Wasilla today is a thriving metropolis of beautiful big box stores and spacious parking lots. The population has grown to nearly 8,000, as Sarah Palin is an ardent proponent of Abstinence-Only Sex Education.

National Mall Improvements Cancelled

 

On a sad day for the grandeur of our Nation’s Capital, The Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) has rescinded maps showing the National Mall as a flood zone. City officials have promised that a stronger levee system will be in place within a year.

NotionsCapital has counted on flooding to improve the unspeakably hideous World War II Memorial unaccountably inflicted on the National Mall when it clearly belongs to Mussolini’s Rome.

FEMA: See how flooding improves the World War II Memorial? Please reconsider.

U.S. Commission of Fine Arts: it is not too late to atone for your grievous aesthetic sin. Lean on FEMA now and flood this ugly embarrassment with the waters of the majestic Potomac.

 

Image by Mike Licht, whose Daddy was in WWII, so spare us comments about the intent of the memorial. It looks horrible. Download a free image of the flood-improved sculpture here. Creative Commons license; credit Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com

The Human Voice of War

Over the past three days, Americans have commemorated and reflected on the human cost of war, remembering those lost in combat on behalf of our country. The Veterans History Project of the Library of Congress allows you to hear the words of those who served, their lives changed forever by the experience of war. Collected and archived under the auspices of the American Folklife Center, you can listen to these voices right now, right here.

 

Graphics: Veterans History Project, Library of Congress.

Rolling Thunder 2008

Photo by dbking

The skies are bright with sunshine, but the streets of Washington, DC roar with thunder. Rolling Thunder is back. The annual motorcycle event, originally conceived to draw attention to the plight of Vietnam-era POWs and MIAs, has grown into a roaring tribute to all America’s veterans.