Plaxico Burress in 89 Words

Plaxico Burress in 89 Words

Plaxico Burress wears sweatpants to accommodate his injured hamstring muscle. He wanted to go out, but couldn’t get into a nightclub wearing sweatpants unless he wore lots of gold. He needed a gun to protect the gold, but couldn’t register his 40. cal Glock because police know he fights with his wife. He put the unregistered gun in his waistband because sweatpants don’t have pockets, and shot himself when the gun slipped out of the waistband elastic. He gave a false name at the hospital but got caught anyway.

Details at

Image by Mike Licht. Download a copy here.Creative Commons license; credit Mike Licht,

4 Responses to “Plaxico Burress in 89 Words”

  1. Perfect Holiday Gift 2008 « NotionsCapital Says:

    […] for the NFL player who has too much of […]

  2. Sweatpants — Threat or Menace? « NotionsCapital Says:

    […] Super Bowl star Plaxico Burrris shot himself because he was wearing sweatpants. […]

  3. Police Pounce on Plaxico’s Pants « NotionsCapital Says:

    […] Burress has been very, very naughty, so all he go for Christmas was an executed search warrant.  Mr. Burress presented the officers […]

  4. Foul Shooters « NotionsCapital Says:

    […] Gilbert Arenas doesn’t seem to have learned much since 2003, when he was convicted of possessing an unregistered pistol in California. We hope he remembers the lesson taught by former NFL star Plaxico Burress. […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: