Pardoned Too Late!

Pardoned Too Late!

In a horrifying holiday catastrophe, President Bush’s pardon for “May,” the 2007 National Thanksgiving Turkey, was delivered too late. The unfortunate 45-pound male Meleagris gallopavo was dispatched, plucked, stuffed, roasted, basted, and served with an attractive fruit garnish.

“My sincere apologies to the family and all the turkeys at the Indiana farm close to the victim of this tragedy,” said the President. “I hope this will not ruin the appetites of the American public and depress the $8 billion turkey industry. While I am personally heartbroken, I hafta admit that sage dressing does smell awful darn good.”

“Lines of communication are sort of tangled at the White House right now, what with these resignations and all,” added an Administration source, speaking on condition of anonymity. “And it’s not like the President got much practice granting Death Row pardons when he was Governor of Texas.”

Image by Mike Licht from anonymous White House sources.

One Response to “Pardoned Too Late!”

  1. How Many Turkeys Will He Pardon? « NotionsCapital Says:

    […] President George W. Bush, following a tradition started by Harry Truman, is expected to pardon the 2008 National Thanksgiving Turkey. Mr. Bush has always enjoyed this ceremony, except for the year when things went horribly, tragically wrong, and his pardon came too late. […]

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