Posts Tagged ‘Crime’

Virginia is for Losers

September 5, 2014

Virginia is for Losers

Governors of the Commonwealth of Virginia:

1. Patrick Henry
2. Thomas Jefferson
3. James Monroe
4. Bob McDonnell

Q: Which one was convicted of felony corruption?

Robert Francis McDonnell was the first Virginia Governor with degrees from Christian Broadcasting Network University. He’s also the first one convicted of multiple felonies committed while in office. We cannot confirm if his spouse, Maureen, is the first former NFL Cheerleader to be convicted of felony corruption.

Mr. McDonnell’s misstep was thinking too small, like disgraced former Maryland governor Spiro T. Agnew, who took kickback envelopes full of cash. In America you’re got to steal much bigger stuff, enough of it so you’re Too Big to Jail.

More:

“McDonnell guilty of corruption,” Washington Post

“Former Virginia Gov. McDonnell and Wife Found Guilty,” Valerie Bauerlein and Dawn Chase, Wall Street Journal

“Former Governor in Virginia Guilty in Bribery Case,” Trip Gabriel, New York Times

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Who Watches the Watchers? Thieves.

August 22, 2014

Who Watches the Watchers? Thieves.

“The high-security building housing Interpol’s South Africa office has been burgled for the fifth time in three weeks.”

— “South Africa: Interpol building raided five times,” BBC News

The International Criminal Police Organization, (INTERPOL) is an intergovernmental organization with 190 member countries facilitating international police cooperation.

 “Our high-tech infrastructure of technical and operational support helps meet the growing challenges of fighting crime in the 21st century.”

— INTERPOL website

 The Pretoria office certainly inspires confidence in that.

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Image by Mike Licht. Download a copy here. Creative Commons license; credit Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com

Comments are welcome if they are on-topic, substantive, concise, and not boring or obscene. Comments may be edited for clarity and length.

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Pistol Packin’ Pork Lobbyist

July 24, 2014

Pistol Packin' Pork Lobbyist

Ronald Prestage, President-elect of the National Pork Producers Council, went to the Cannon House Office Building on Capitol Hill Wednesday morning because, you know, pork barrel politics. Mr. Prestage, a veterinarian who runs a 170,000-sow swine operation, was carrying a Ruger 9mm pistol. You never know when you’ll run across a fierce feral hog on The Hill, or a raging, veggie-wearin’ PETA protester. Unsympathetic Capitol Hill Police arrested him. House Republicans want everyone in DC to pack heat, just not around them.

When Dr. Prestage realized he had his gun in his bag, you can imagine how he felt. He’s a former Chairman of the National Turkey Federation.

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Germany: Wurst Crime Ever

July 20, 2014

Germany: Wurst Crime Ever

Germany’s anti-trust agency (Bundeskartellamt) has fined 21 sausage manufacturers and 33 individuals $460 million for illegal price-fixing over two decades.  Gott im Himmel!

The ring is alleged to have met in Hamburg’s luxurious Hotel Atlantic. Wonder what they ate?

Sausages are central to the German identity, second only to beer. In related German crime news, thieves in the city of Krefeld broke into a warehouse and stole 300,000 liters (80,000 gallons) of beer. Ten truckloads. Worth $3 million. Right before Germany’s big World Cup celebration party.

More:

“German sausage makers in meaty fine over price-fixing,” BBC News

“Bundeskartellamt imposes fines on sausage manufacturers,” press release

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Short link: http://wp.me/p6sb6-jA0

Image by Mike Licht. Download a copy here. Creative Commons license; credit Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com

Comments are welcome if they are on-topic, substantive, concise, and not boring or obscene. Comments may be edited for clarity and length.

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Taiwan Busts Racing Pigeon Kidnapping Ring

July 14, 2014

Taiwan Busts Racing Pigeon Kidnapping Ring

“Five people have been arrested in northern Taiwan for allegedly kidnapping dozens of racing pigeons for ransom, police said Tuesday. The suspects were accused of setting traps along racing routes to capture the pigeons before demanding up to Tw$10,000 ($333) per bird from their owners in ransom money, the Taipei City police department said.”

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‘I Stole Your Bike’

February 19, 2014

I Stole Your Bike

Christian, Stephon and Joshua White followed a bike thief around and shot the documentary I Stole Your Bike. Here’s the trailer:

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Florida: Play Loud Music, Get Shot Dead

February 16, 2014

Florida: Play Loud Music, Get Shot Dead

If you play loud music in your car while in the parking lot of a Florida convenience store on a Friday night, expect to be shot dead. It’s not murder.

If you stop your car for a few minutes in the parking lot of a Florida convenience store on a Friday night and you judge the music emanating from another car poses a threat to your life, remove the 9 millimeter pistol from your glove compartment and blast away. It’s not murder.

If you stop your car for a few minutes in the parking lot of a Florida convenience store on a Friday night and you instigate a confrontation with a group of teenagers in another car, remove the 9 millimeter pistol from your glove compartment and blast away, even as the other car is leaving the scene with the dead body of a young man you have just shot dead lying in the backseat. It’s not murder. It’s Florida justice.

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Santa Doesn’t Play

December 25, 2013

It’s Elves vs. Trolls in Hampton, Virginia. Shoplifters and muggers, be warned: Santa doesn’t play. Courtesy of the Hampton Police Department.

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Short link: http://wp.me/p6sb6-ifO

Comments are welcome if they are on-topic, substantive, concise, and not boring or obscene. Comments may be edited for clarity and length.

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Silvio Berlusconi Returns to Private Life

November 30, 2013

Silvio Berlusconi Returns to Private Life

The Italian Senate expelled billionaire septuagenarian, football team ownerBunga-Bunga Party host, one-time cruise ship crooner and disgraced 3-time former Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi from membership last week so he could spend more time with his attorneys and under-aged females. The proximate cause: Mr. Berlusconi’s recent tax fraud conviction. For the first time in two decades, the Italian Government is Berlusconi-free.

Private Citizen Berlusconi has problems. There are new charges that he and his lawyers paid off trial witnesses to his notorious “bunga bunga” sex parties. The 77-year- old’s 28-year-old showgirl girlfriend has appealed to that great champion of morally challenged billionaires, Pope Francis, to clear Silvio’s name.

Update:

“Berlusconi, The Perils of Not Knowing When to Say Goodbye,” Marcello Sorgi, La Stampa via Worldcrunch

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Image (“Berlusconi Seraglio, after Fernand Cormon”) by Mike Licht. Download a copy here. Creative Commons license; credit Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com

Comments are welcome if they are on-topic, substantive, concise, and not boring or obscene. Comments may be edited for clarity and length.

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Assault Rifles Stolen From Bass Fishing Shop

October 6, 2013

Assault Rifles Stolen From Bass Fishing Shop

Thieves broke into a Bass Pro Shop in Macon, Georgia and stole 17 AR-15 military-style rifles. Now 17 Georgia homeowners cannot protect their families from the roving packs of savage Largemouth Bass menacing the Peach State. The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives is offering a $5,000 reward for info on the bandits, matched by the arms dealer’s lobby, the National Shooting Sports Foundation, for a total of $10,000. That’s about 3/4 of the retail value of the firearms and the amount of first-place prize money at a medium-sized bass shooting tournament.

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Short link:  http://wp.me/p6sb6-hwD

Image (“Bass-Shooting Season in Georgia”) by Mike Licht. Download a copy here. Creative Commons license; credit Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com

Comments are welcome if they are on-topic, substantive, concise, and not boring or obscene. Comments may be edited for clarity and length.


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