Redskins Cheerleaders

NFL cheerleader tryout finals were held at the State Theatre in Falls Church, Virginia today. You may be thinking “Hey! Falls Church doesn’t HAVE an NFL team,” and you’re right. The team in question has “Washington” in its name, right before a racial slur, but it practices in Virginia and plays in Maryland.

Anyway, NFL cheerleaders are picked for their athletic skills dance talent personalities and pom-pom prowess. They’re all about the same height, too. But don’t think pro sports cheerleaders are dumb; many are scientists and engineers. Need empirical proof? Observe this demonstration of classical mechanics:

New Model Year at the Auto Show

It’s that that time again. Gleaming new automobiles are being previewed at auto shows, and pretty young girls are leaning on them. This symbolism sends messages you won’t find in manufacturers’ specifications. Men: buy this car, get that girl. Women: buy this car, be that girl.

Back in the last century, when the USA manufactured real products instead of just bad business deals, the auto show circuit started in Detroit, the Motor City, and fanned out around the country. Today the auto industry is globalized, and so is the car show circuit. The U.S. may not sell many American cars abroad, but the Girls-Leaning-on-Cars concept is a hot export. Compare the ladies of the Detroit, Delhi, Tokyo, Geneva, Guangzhou, and Qatar auto shows.

The meme has permeated all levels of American culture. See selected Flickr images from family photos, movie mags, and amateur hot rod shows in these galleries.

Berlusconi Celebrates Mussolini; Gal Pal Cashes In

Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi commemorated the work of his predecessor, Prime Minister Benito Mussolini, in a ceremony at the Vatican yesterday. Mr. Berlusconi met with Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone to mark the anniversary of the 1929 Lateran Treaty establishing 109-acre Vatican City within Rome. That’s the same Cardinal Bertone who urged “everyone, especially those who hold a position of public responsibility [...] to commit themselves to a more robust morality, a sense of justice and legality.” The two officials may have shaken hands, and it is unclear whether the Cardinal wiped his off afterwards.

Berlusconi is Going Down. Here’s Why.

Italian media billionaire Silvio Berlusconi has been indicted by an Italian court and will go to trial in April. His case has attracted a bit of attention since: 1) the 74-year-old is accused of relations with an exotic teenage prostitute, and 2) Mr. Berlusconi is Italy’s Prime Minister.

A half-million Italian women recently protested Mr. Berlusconi’s patronage of teenage prostitutes, but another charge puts him in greater legal jeopardy. The young lady in question was taken into police custody for seizing money and jewels belonging to another. In an attempt to cover up his relationship with her, the Prime Minister sent his attractive dental hygienist/procuress/member of parliament to the police station to free the teen. Well, sure, anybody would.

No Girlz Allowed — Blogging is for Boys!

Canadian columnist Margaret Wente wrote a column called “Why are bloggers male?” You can read it on her blog.

Okay, it’s a newspaper website, but it’s online. Other online women wonder what universe Ms. Wente lives in, chief among them Mary Elizabeth Williams of Salon‘s Broadsheet:

Tiger Woods Gets a Rise Out of the Stock Market

Disgraced golfer Tiger Woods danced his “heavily-choreographed apology” for adultery on TV and the stock market rose, notes the Wall Street Journal.

While correlation is not causation and past results do not guarantee future performance, this is The Year of the Tiger.

Image (“Tiger Woods’ New Logo”) by Mike Licht. Download a copy here. Creative Commons license; credit Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com

Comments are welcome if they are on-topic, substantive, concise, and not boring or obscene. Comments may be edited for clarity and length.

Barbie’s Big Birthday

 

Barbara Millicent Roberts, better known as Barbie, was born at the International Toy Fair in New York on March 9, 1959. Today the youthful-looking Pisces celebrates her 50th birthday with several million of her closest gal pals in the biggest single event of Women’s History Month.  

Barbie has undoubtedly received a birthday card from AARP announcing her eligibility for membership and inviting her to join. Barbie never formally retired from any of her 108 occupations, but AARP doesn’t stand for “American Association of Retired Persons” anymore. It stands for “AARP.”

Car Guide for Guys

(Excuse us a moment, ladies.)

Yo, dudes.

Jalopnik‘s Andrew Didorosi closes out 2008 with insightful analysis of the auto-motives of American males, comparing dreams and realities.  

Best rear-end year-end car review ever.

 

Image by Mike Licht. Download a copy here. Creative Commons license; credit Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com

Comments are welcome if they are on-topic, substantive, concise, and not obscene. Comments are subject to editing for clarity and length.

 

Salzburg Head-Banger Gabfest!

The quaint cobbled streets of Salzburg, Austria ring with string quartets, opera, lieder, and matronly tourists singing tunes from “The Sound of Music.” Next week, Mozart meets Motörhead as 120 scholars gun their Harleys into town for an international conference on Heavy Metal Music. You may have read about in InsideHigherEd or SCREAM! Magazine.

Turn it up to eleven, PhDudes!

The conference was organized by Dr. Niall Scott of the University of Central Lancashire, who told MusicRadar it is time to “recognise heavy metal’s contribution to western society” as a “barometer of what is happening at the extreme edges of political and youth cultures. It’s a movement that maintains extremism in art and culture for its subversion, controversies and silliness.”

Palin Baby Daddy High School Drop-Out

Perhaps Levi Johnston (18) and Bristol Palin (17) can be married by Judge David L. Zwink, who presided at their speeding and traffic infraction trials (guilty every time). Judge Zink also found Mr. Johnston guilty of two game fishing violations carrying $100 and $250 fines (he paid them late).

Levi Johnston, a hockey player for Wasilla High School, is not listed on the team roster for 2008-2009, and his mother isn’t saying if he graduated. She does say he’s no longer a student. – Mark Silva, The Swamp.